Jump to content

The Protestant Community

Christian and Theologically Protestant? Or, sincerely inquiring about the Protestant faith? Welcome to Christforums the Christian Protestant community. You'll first need to register in order to join our community. Create or respond to threads on your favorite topics and subjects. Registration takes less than a minute, it's simple, fast, and free! Enjoy the fellowship! God bless, Christforums' Staff
Register now

Fenced Community

Christforums is a Protestant Christian forum, open to Bible- believing Christians such as Presbyterians, Lutherans, Reformed, Baptists, Church of Christ members, Pentecostals, Anglicans. Methodists, Charismatics, or any other conservative, Nicene- derived Christian Church. We do not solicit cultists of any kind, including Mormons, Jehovah's Witnesses, Eastern Lightning, Falun Gong, Unification Church, Aum Shinrikyo, Christian Scientists or any other non- Nicene, non- Biblical heresy.
Register now

Christian Fellowship

John Calvin puts forward a very simple reason why love is the greatest gift: “Because faith and hope are our own: love is diffused among others.” In other words, faith and hope benefit the possessor, but love always benefits another. In John 13:34–35 Jesus says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” Love always requires an “other” as an object; love cannot remain within itself, and that is part of what makes love the greatest gift.
Sign in to follow this  
atruelove2005

Should You Keep Being Friends with an Ex?

Recommended Posts

When we leave our significant other or they leave us, staying as friends isn’t usually the first thought that comes into our minds. But later on in life, when the echoes of our quarrels have died down and our hearts have healed, our minds tend to drift to thoughts of our ex, especially if they’ve been part of our lives for quite some time.

 

 

We think about the one that got away and what it could have been had things worked out with them. We see their pictures on social media and wonder why you’re still friends in Facebook. Then we ask ourselves if it’s okay to keep being friends with an ex. Is it really alright, though?

 

 

Personally, I think being friends with an ex can be beneficial. It’s a sign of maturity that we’re able to accept an ex’s friendship without attaching any romantic feelings. It’s also good for closure, like if you had a falling-out with your partner and your relationship ended abruptly, revisiting your relationship some time later can help weave the wounds close. It gives us an opportunity to forgive and forget and release any grudge we hold in our hearts. Peacefully, of course.

 

 

A platonic friendship with an ex is great for practical reasons too. I know a guy who still lives with his ex-girlfriend. They’ve been in a relationship for around eight years in the same house, and they had stuff they bought and paid for together. When they fell out of love, they just agreed to keep the status quo as it would’ve been too much trouble sorting out who owns this piece of furniture, or that unwashed plushy.

 

 

In times of need, each of them still provides for the other even if they’re no longer dating. It may seem like they’re still a couple, but they’ve agreed that that’s not the case and that there’s no more romantic love between them anymore. It’s just simple friendship between two ex-lovers.

 

 

When we’ve broken up with someone, we sometimes think that that was the end, that there’s nothing to think about anymore as it is over and there’s no getting back together. But sometimes, something beautiful can remain buried beneath the ashes of a failed relationship. Being friends with an ex can lead to a different sort of friendship.

 

 

Do you think being friends with an ex is good? Share some of your stories.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know there may be exceptions but as for me I would avoid them. I would feel in contacting them without my wife's knowledge that I would be betraying her and this would make me feel awful inside. Even with my wife's okay (this would never happen) I would still stay away.

 

I would definitely not want to see them in person. I don't know about others but the thought would be there for me to hook back up with her. It's just bad news all around.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If you can be friends without lust, then there doesn't seem to be any reason why not. I know a few former couples who realised during courting that they were much better as friends than they ever would be in a relationship. In the cases where they stayed friends without trouble they've been honest and open with their current spouses about the past, and why there is no chance of things rekindling, and the exs have become friends of the couple, not just the spouse. Trying to hide something like that or keeping it a secret, is just asking for problems.

 

I would definitely not want to see them in person. I don't know about others but the thought would be there for me to hook back up with her. It's just bad news all around.
If you're still holding a torch for them like that, then trying to keep them in your life as a friend is not a good idea. You'd just be exposing yourself to temptation, and it isn't fair on your spouse.

 

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Should you still be friends with your ex. That depends on the situation. The reason for the break-up. If there are kids involved and the ex's Can be friends -- yes, a sign of maturity -- their kids still need to see that Mom and Dad are nice people And sometimes it simply isn't possible to be friends. They got married for a reason and turned around and got divorced for a reason.

 

Sometimes spouses forget that dating stops once a person gets married.

 

Once there is a remarriage -- being friends with an ex Can be a recipe for disaster. Or it Can end up being a Good thing. Depending on if there are kids involved.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would say no to being friends with an ex,the reason being is that the ex could have a new love and their new love could get jealous.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
Articles - News - Privacy Policy