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Lying?

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  • Lying?

    I read somewhere the people average out about thirteen to fourteen lies throughout the first conversation with someone new. So I was wondering how we are suppose to avoid something that we do subconsciously. The scientist was including 'white' lies and exaggerations in that number but it still counts as lying. It this every deceitful world, how do we guard ourselves against our own minds?

  • #2
    Don't you kinda think that number of thirteen to fourteen is exaggerated because I don't have to hide my age in person when talking to people or telling them how many kids I have or whatnot so who are all these abundant liars in the world out there or is this where we're supposed to be paranoid about every one we meet from now on?
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    • #3
      Originally posted by TurtleHare View Post
      Don't you kinda think that number of thirteen to fourteen is exaggerated because I don't have to hide my age in person when talking to people or telling them how many kids I have or whatnot so who are all these abundant liars in the world out there or is this where we're supposed to be paranoid about every one we meet from now on?
      The psychologist weren't talking normal conversation but first time meeting between strangers. They were also counting 'white' lies or exaggerations, even if they were small. So even smaller lies like liking the same kind of wine, that would count as a lie. And I can kind of believe it with all the self-help guide that teach you how to sell or be liable in a crowd. They do encourage you to sacrifice the complete truth to be likable when it comes to first impressions because that's what people will remember you by until you establish a relationship. It doesn't take into consideration normal conversation with people you know because they are more likely to call you on your lies and exaggerations. Having said that though, most of my family events are filled with conversation where everyone is dramatizing how great or awful the year has been over turkey and gravy. So yeah, I kind of believe the number, not all the time but under certain circumstances.
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      • #4
        Most of my first time conversations only last about 10 minutes so I doubt I say 15 things within that timespan to lie so much hehe
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        • #5
          There is one solution to lying. Talk less. The more you talk, the more you'll lie and number of lies you tell drop significanly if you "tame your tongue". As the wise man said, too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.
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          • #6
            I don't think we are lying subconsciously, instead, we are lying in full presence of our mind which feed us fallacious thoughts to support our lies and save us from shame. We are afraid to be judged by other people so we lie to cover up negative sides of our total persona. Sometimes, we are after other peoples trust so we lie and pretend to be a better person. If we were trained to tell the truth on our younger years it is never an issue to tell the truth and condemn lying.
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            • #7
              Originally posted by LeapOfFaith89 View Post
              I read somewhere the people average out about thirteen to fourteen lies throughout the first conversation with someone new. So I was wondering how we are suppose to avoid something that we do subconsciously. The scientist was including 'white' lies and exaggerations in that number but it still counts as lying. It this every deceitful world, how do we guard ourselves against our own minds?
              I think it is a matter of consciously choosing to be aware of what you are doing and taking responsibility for it. If you know you have a tendency to lie when you meet people you should be better able to stop yourself from doing it. Whatever it was you read made you aware of the problem, so now there is less excuse for continuing the behavior. As for people that did not read about this or see the article, they still aren't off the hook. Anyone if they truly want to can make the choice to be honest and ask God for the strength to do so.
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              • #8
                Well, lying is okay to me as long as I use that an excuse not to do something I'm really unwilling to deal with. However, it has a lot of different faces some of which are terrible. A scam, deceit, leading on, false statements... they're all kind of criminal. I would lie to someone only If that doesn't lead to a start of their suffering the moment they discover the truth.

                Moreover, we sometimes tend to hide our true views and passions in order to be accepted by our peer group. That's absolutely no good.
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                • #9
                  Originally posted by artyarson View Post
                  Well, lying is okay to me as long as I use that an excuse not to do something I'm really unwilling to deal with. However, it has a lot of different faces some of which are terrible. A scam, deceit, leading on, false statements... they're all kind of criminal. I would lie to someone only If that doesn't lead to a start of their suffering the moment they discover the truth.

                  Moreover, we sometimes tend to hide our true views and passions in order to be accepted by our peer group. That's absolutely no good.
                  Lying really isn't okay though. When you start making exceptions based on your ideas of severity it gets easier to lie. I don't think God makes exceptions like that. Making exceptions for sinful behavior is essentially lying to yourself which is not a healthy thing to do. how can you seek forgiveness for your sins if you can't be honest about them?
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