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What would you do

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    What would you do

    Last year I had a very difficult decision to make, a friend of mine decided to let his life come to an end. I found him on the floor in his bedroom and he was away with the fairies. I had to call an ambulance because he was up against the door and not able to move. The problem was sorted, he had a water infection, was taken into hospital and I thought was sorted out. When I went to visit he had been moved to a cancer ward, I had no idea, his family had no idea and he decided that was the Last straw, he was in so much pain from arthritis, he lost a leg after his wife died and he had just had enough. I arranged a meeting with his solicitor and the hospital.
    The hospital asked me to convince him to have treatment, knowing the man and how unhappy he was. And when the water infection cleared he was in sound mind. I know what I did, what would you have done?

    #2
    Probably the same thing. Why would there be a question about it?
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      #3
      Originally posted by Sue D. View Post
      Probably the same thing. Why would there be a question about it?
      Probably because the type of cancer had very high success rates, and it was caught very early. He starved himself and I looked after him while he did. It does bother me a bit still. I believe I would do the same again, because I would not want anyone taking my choices away from me.
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        #4
        Originally posted by Canny View Post

        Probably because the type of cancer had very high success rates, and it was caught very early. He starved himself and I looked after him while he did. It does bother me a bit still. I believe I would do the same again, because I would not want anyone taking my choices away from me.
        I didn't understand what you'd said, apparently. You were helping him starve himself?
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          #5
          I would have considered the value of his life greater than the amount of his pain and try to convince him of the same.

          Now if he was dying and treatment would only prolong his life of nothing but suffering to the point where he could do nothing I would support his choice in refusing treatment. That wouldn't be the same as suicide, that would be living out the rest of life naturally in my opinion. But I can't support or assest suicide just to spare someones dignity.
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            #6
            Truly a very touchy subject.
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              #7
              Originally posted by Canny View Post

              Probably because the type of cancer had very high success rates, and it was caught very early. He starved himself and I looked after him while he did. It does bother me a bit still. I believe I would do the same again, because I would not want anyone taking my choices away from me.
              Many Christians believe we are not to end our own lives, but I have a different view. I saw my mother and mother-in-law die horrible deaths when the means was available to save them from suffering. Now I am older and wish I had the means to choose to go easily. There are times when a decision should be left up to an individual about whether they want to continue in a life of pain and anguish. No one should have the right to decide for another. There is also a greed factor: of course homes don't want an individual to die that they can squeeze money out of. My cousin was in one and called me crying because they refused to let her leave. I called the director and she tried bullying me and I stood up to her and told her to let her leave. She did when she saw I wasn't going to fall for her manipulation. There are immoral people in positions where they want to get control of someone's assets.
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                #8
                Like saint I've seen someone in my own family go through this. Instead of being allowed to pass quietly in his sleep at home, he ended up passing away among strangers on tubes and wires because the medical staff did not respect his wishes or his family's and continued the treatment even when there was no hope of recovery or even pain management. That was inhumane.

                I'm a firm supporter of pallative care if a condition is untreatable. Sometimes that does mean a patient receives a higher than safe dose of medications or painkillers, but if the condition is already fatal and untreatable, it is having to choose between quality of life over quantity. I don't see this as suicide because it is intended to manage the condition, not to kill the patient.

                What would I have done in your situation? If he's lost a leg, got arthritis, and now cancer, refusing treatment is his right. Chemotherapy is not easy, painless, or guaranteed to work especially with older patients. I'd have made sure he was of sound mind and making his decision rationally, and then phoned a hospice or other organisation to see what quality of life could have been managed for him in his last days and let him pass at home.
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                  #9
                  Originally posted by ChatterBox View Post
                  Like saint I've seen someone in my own family go through this. Instead of being allowed to pass quietly in his sleep at home, he ended up passing away among strangers on tubes and wires because the medical staff did not respect his wishes or his family's and continued the treatment even when there was no hope of recovery or even pain management. That was inhumane.

                  I'm a firm supporter of pallative care if a condition is untreatable. Sometimes that does mean a patient receives a higher than safe dose of medications or painkillers, but if the condition is already fatal and untreatable, it is having to choose between quality of life over quantity. I don't see this as suicide because it is intended to manage the condition, not to kill the patient.

                  What would I have done in your situation? If he's lost a leg, got arthritis, and now cancer, refusing treatment is his right. Chemotherapy is not easy, painless, or guaranteed to work especially with older patients. I'd have made sure he was of sound mind and making his decision rationally, and then phoned a hospice or other organisation to see what quality of life could have been managed for him in his last days and let him pass at home.
                  I think this is a balanced and sensible approach. I believe in the rights of each individual. I recall James Dobson- who I usually like - spoke out against euthanasia and I'm afraid like a pied piper he misled a lot Christians. His argument is that it would lead to forced euthanasia. That could be a problem but right now we have forced living - no matter what level of suffering an individual lives with. When I visited my mother-in-law it broke my heart seeing dozens of elderly people slumped over in wheelchairs like zombies. The place smelled horrible and my mother-in-law was unmedicated even though I demanded she be. So those places are misery chambers similar to how the Jews were treated in Germany - it's torture. Everyone should contact legislators to ask for right-to-die laws.
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